When I opened the door just now, a lizard ran into my house. Downside: a minute later, when the cat crept up behind me for a pat, I accidentally elbowed him the face because I thought he was the lizard. Upside: having searched for "lizard in my house," I found that while the advice thereby available wasn't particularly helpful--"place peacock feathers in those lizard hideouts"?--it does confirm that the long tail of the internet a) exists, and b) is full of very helpful, well-intentioned people.

In any case, here's the police sketch:

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